Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Don't Be Tardy for the Party, ohh ohhh

I was texting with my friend J today and she told me if she could be a Real Housewife, she would be Alexis from the OC, not because she has "Jesus Jugs" or rents a mansion, but because she can appear delusional at times, and sometimes, ignorance is bliss. Amen, J.

If you would have asked me a few months ago what (former) Real Housewife I would be, I would hands down be Bethenny Frankel. I am loud, comedic, good at impressions, into health foods and into making my alcoholic beverages as skinny as possible.

However, she recently split from her ADORBS husband Jason and they're going through an icky divorce because she is a millionaire from her skinny girl Margaritas. (Warning: That stuff gets you crunked. Skinny=alcohol only!) I wouldn't want that.

So I thought further. Though I would love to be Lisa Vanderpump because of her closet of million dollar pink dresses and handbags, I would have to realistically say I am more like Kim Zolciak.

No I do not wear wigs, or answer to the name, "Wig". I also never, unfortunately, had a sugar daddy named "Big Poppa" who provided with me with an income. With those details aside, Kim and I are kindred spirits. We have both been down rocky roads with the opposite sex. We both enjoy singing country music and I would could definitely see myself being 35 lip sinking and dancing at the all-gay "white party" in Miami. Kim and I also have an affinity for Starbucks, bling and food we should not eat.  Lastly, we are both hot messes, in the best sense of the word. People love us because we say and sometimes do kind of ridiculous things, (most of the time) not on purpose. Sometimes we are inappropriate, but most of all, we are pretty loyal to the important people in our lives.

How does this relate to wellness, you ask? Watching Bravo reality shows keeps me well. They're funny, usually not too deep and people do things so ridiculous I feel better about myself. 

So tell me, what Bravolebrity/Real Housewife are you? 


  1. I am right there with you with Bethenny, love her and would love to be here!

  2. I don't watch any Housewives shows but in my thinner days, people often would say I looked like an old character named Jo, so I'll go with that ;)

  3. BETHENNY FRANKEL!!!!! FO sho my favorite too. Alexis drives me nuts, but she is beautiful. I also really love how real Tamra is from O.C. and of course Lisa Vanderpump from BH. And I hated Jason! He was such a ninny- Bethenny needs a manly man who is more alpha than she. Love that you write about the housewives! lol I can totally relate.


Thanks so much for commenting! I read every one! Stay well and xoxo, Mer In America